Give Me Liberty

The Well-Fed Son loves eating out as much as The Chef and I do.  Imagine that.  He frequently asks, “Can we go eat somewhere?”  One of his favorite places to eat out is Chick-fil-A, so the last time we were there, we received with our meal a “Save the Date” type of flyer for their upcoming Daddy-Daughter Date Night.  I was impressed.

For the life of me, I cannot remember exactly when, where or who first told me about this idea of Daddies dating their daughters, but it is something The Chef and I have discussed doing when our children reach a certain age.  It never would have occurred to me that some would see it as a bad idea until I got online to find out more about Chick-fil-A’s event.

One of the first things I came across was this search result: Really Chick-fil-A?  Daddy/Daugher Date Night?  Raise your hand if you’re shocked {sarcasm} to learn that this offense at Chick-fil-A’s Daddy-Daughter Date Night was found on a Dallas Observer blog?  If your hand is raised, you may be among the 55% of America who have little or no trust in the media and/or the 60% that believe the media is biased, as found by Gallup.  Now I am getting onto a soapbox.  Excuse me for a moment while I step down!

Personally, I believe there are a few reasons why Daddies should date their daughters:

1 ~ To model for their daughters how they should be treated on a date.  The college ministry leader at the church I was involved in during my college years used an illustration while teaching that has really stuck with me.  He said that people in the banking industry are trained to spot counterfeit money by learning the real thing so well that they would immediately recognize a counterfeit.

If a girl has been shown by her father how to be treated by males on a date, as in like a gentleman treats a lady, then she will know right away when she’s not being treated this way.  I believe once my daughter understands how she should be treated, she would not “settle” for less than that standard.

2 ~ To build their daughter’s self esteem and self image.  In the book, Captivating, John and Stasi Eldredge talk about the longing in every little girl’s heart to be seen as beautiful.  Our daughters are bombarded daily by messages about how our society thinks they should look, as I discussed in a previous blog, Beauty, Body Image and Anorexia.  If a father takes the time to counter those message by acknowledging her beauty, but also to help her see past the focus on the outward beauty to cultivating the inner beauty, he can help give her a strong foundation for a healthy self esteem and self image and she will be much less likely to be looking for those types of affirmations in unhealthy relationships.

3 ~ Perfect time for one-on-one communication.  As our children move through the teenage years, there are so many things that we as parents need to be talking with them regularly about, keeping the lines of communication as open as possible, in hopes that if they are struggling, they will feel comfortable talking with us and seeking help if they need it.  The day-to-day demands of the rat race we run in our culture make it difficult to find good times for this kind of regular communication.  Dates between males and females are where a lot of communication happens as they get to know each other.  For a father and his daughter, it provides time between just the two of them where, if she has something on her mind or her heart, she has his full attention.

These are just a few reasons why I believe Daddy-Daughter date nights can be an invaluable tool in raising a daughter.  I am sure there are other reasons.  If you have one, please share in the comments.

I’m looking forward to seeing more of the special relationship my daughter and her daddy share and what kind of an impact dates with her daddy will have on her.